i wrote half this post last weekend, and then the internet broke for a few days, so this is a long one. the photo is the view behind our house (check out my internet connection!)
sunday i visited the kigali genocide memorial. the memorial is in a modern white building, surrounded by commemorative gardens, overlooking one of kigali's many crowded valleys. the exhibit was moving and informative, a powerful combination of a historical account of the genesis and execution of the genocide and audio-visual testimonials from survivors. the end of the exhibit is made up of large photos of children killed in the genocide, each labeled with the child's name, the manner in which they were killed and details such as their favourite food or final words. in the gardens surrounding the building are several mass graves in which over 250,000 people are buried, most of whom remain unidentified. obviously submerging myself in the horror of those 100 days for a few hours was deeply saddening and thought-provoking. but it sheds no light on how rwanda is to move on from these events, though in many ways it is doing just that. as you stand by the mass graves you see a steady stream of people walking up the hill past the memorial, on their way home, jerry-cans of water balanced on their heads. i wonder how many of those people have family members in the mass graves, and how many think of them as they walk by. and i think about the tensions in rwanda's governance (eg the arrest and conditional release of kagame's opponent in the upcoming elections http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/8638129.stm) - while building, rebuilding and 'reconciliation' efforts appear to be in full-force, one can't help but wonder what the future holds.
later on in the week i had a great conversation with a rwandan friend. he's in his mid 20s and lost about half his family in the genocide (he said he was surprised one day to notice a photo of his brother among those displayed at the memorial where i was on sunday). he said talking about the genocide is unpredictable for him, maybe fine, or suddenly painful, and that there are certain things he doesn't want to talk about (like his own experience). but he told me he'd like to write a book about rwanda, expressly not about the genocide - there's more to this country than that dark chapter in its history, his says.
one of the remarkable things about rwanda is its health system. this week, PSF has had officials from tanzania visiting kigali and learning about the project's activities and efforts to roll out couples counseling and testing in government health centres. one of my colleagues was telling me how amazed they were by the community health systems in place in rwanda. couples counseling and testing is gaining in popularity across africa, but rwanda is light-years ahead. one of the reasons has been a supportive government with leverage at the community level. almost all women presenting for PMTCT (prevention of mother to child transmission) services are accompanied by their male partners, and are turned away if they present alone - unless their village chief has written a letter explaining the partner's absence. every community also has elected volunteers called animateurs de sante, whose role is to promote access to healthcare in their community - eg advising couples to be tested for HIV together. the tanzanian officials were highly impressed, but doubtful that the same results could be achieved in tanzania - perhaps if paul kagame was transplanted to tanzania, they said.
in general my life in kigali is becoming more and more familiar, comprehensible, comfortable, as i meet people and explore the city. i've heard many expats talk about rwandan society being closed, about the difficulty of talking to their rwandan co-workers. i've found my co-workers to be initially reserved but with a little perseverence and interest in local customs, they're becoming warm and friendly. that said, this society may well be less accessible than many. firstly, local norms of politeness value quietness and seriousness (this was also true in malawi, and contrasts with the american emphasis on enthusiasm and cheerfulness). then there's the fact the country basically operates as a military dictatorship, with strict rules and regulations being followed, including not talking about certain things, eg tribalism. then there's the genuine psychological difficulty many people have speaking about some topics, eg genocide experiences (and the - not incorrect - assumption that outsiders will have difficulty relating to them). then there's the language barrier, arguably complicated by the recent shift in official language from french to english, meaning even educated people are often not completely comfortable in their worplace language. (and very few expats learn kinyarwanda, the local language). the end result seems to be that the expat experience is fairly segregated from the local, and it's hard to really get a handle on why. sure, there are cultural differences, linguistic barriers, income differentials etc but i can't help feeling much of the barrier is constructed or somehow scripted. for example, for my first 10 days here i did not understand where most of my rwandan coworkers ate lunch. eventually, i discovered that the wife of one of the lab techs brings home-cooked food every day, which most people buy and eat together. it seems the obvious choice to me, but no one had told me about it, none of the other expats seem particularly interested, and there was some surprise (quickly replaced by warm welcome) that i was. i'm fascinated by how that dynamic becomes established, and whether it should or can be changed. i hope by the time i leave i'll be more integrated and spending more time in rwandan hang-outs. i'm just surprised at what hard work it is to do that.
work is fine - still a little slow, though picking up. i'm helping with logistics and monitoring of nationwide roll-out of couples counseling and testing in government clinics. not hugely taxing, but just seeing how the project is run and watching systems unfold is a great experience for me. plus it's giving my french a new lease of life. and leaves me with plenty of time and energy to immerse myself in rwanda and generally relax.
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